Training metrics

Runners, generally being of an anxious disposition (an easy-going bunch we are not), like to track their training according to several metrics: not just distance run, but also km pace, kms per hour, and increasingly for those of us creaking into middle-age, heartrate zone. Indeed, some runners even pay hundreds of dollars for a smartwatch to tell them they are ‘unproductive’ or otherwise lacking on a regular basis. (I don't need a smartwatch as I have an inner monologue which tells me this for free.)

A novel but effective training metric which has emerged from Broad Park parkrun is kms/GR – kilometres per golden retriever. In other words, what is your ratio of kilometres run to golden retrievers spotted? On my lunchtime run today, for example, I had a ratio of 6 kms per golden retriever (I ran 6km and saw one golden retriever trotting its way happily through the world). A ratio of 5kms per golden retriever is the gold (hoho) standard here – an achievable target particularly on a parkrun morning. 

Maybe I Like the Misery

It’s a funny one, isn’t it, sponsoring someone for one of their pre-existing hobbies? Sponsoring me to run is a bit like sponsoring me to eat chocolate or play piano – both things I regularly do and enjoy doing regularly. What’s the suffering and self-flagellation involved?

So for sponsors to feel they’re getting get ‘value’ for their donations this month, in the form of my personal discomfort, I’ve (re-)introduced something that makes even the most seasoned runners tremble: intervals.

Intervals consist of running at ‘oh this hurts’ pace for a short amount of time (e.g.; one minute, two minutes), followed by a short recovery. Repeat until you are questioning your life choices and wondering why you are voluntarily spending your free time in such a masochistic way.

Intervals apparently have myriad benefits for overall health and fitness but as I said, even the keeners runners tend to groan at the prospect. (Surely HealthPathways > Menopause is trolling clinicians and patients alike by advising ‘Sprint interval training can increase total lean mass, decrease total fat mass, and increase aerobic fitness in overweight postmenopausal women’. While true, I can only imagine the death stares a GP would receive if telling a patient who has come in with menopausal symptoms to go out and start sprinting around the track near their house. In fact, death stares might be too mild. I’d be concerned the GP would sustain grievous personal injury).

So rest assured that if you’ve donated this month, I am managing to make the challenge as, well, challenging as possible. 

The beginning

Support my challenge to save Kiwi hearts

This May, I’m taking part in MyMarathon to raise funds for heart research that will help save lives.

Every 90 minutes, a person dies of heart disease. It's the single biggest killer in New Zealand, and I want to do something to support the thousands of Kiwis whose lives are impacted by this disease every single day.